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| The Washington Canard Where C-SPAN is the local TV news |
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Thursday, March 23, 2006
A WHOLE NEW WORLD, OR THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE? YES! The Washington Canard has been on the quiet side these past couple weeks, as it's been a busy fortnight for yours truly. And as some of you already know, busy not just because of the usual daily grind, but because I put in my two weeks' notice on March 10. That's right — I'm finally leaving the Hotline. Leaving the Blogometer, leaving the Watergate, and leaving behind the 5AM commute. Within one week of this post, I'll be starting a new job in a new city. Yes, that other city is one Metro stop across the river from my soon-to-be-old-job — but hey, I've always wanted to say that. Here's what ran in the "People" section of today's Hotline:
Special thanks to Echopraxia, who helped me get this notification into shape, over Google Talk from the Antipodes, early this morning East coast time. Anyway, all this means things are likely to remain slow around here for a little while, as I'll likely be more than occupied by the new gig. Eventually I'll be moving this blog to its own domain, as I've said before, although how soon depends on a handful of factors, none of which I'm prepared to discuss here (but in earlier posts, yes). One is the impending launch of my next blog-related project, a logical extension of the Blogometer and one that's been in the planning and research stages nearly six months now. And if you're in the know, shhh. I'll certainly be back in a week or so with an announcement about that. Sunday, March 19, 2006
RIP, MY ALMOST NAMESAKE From the world of infotainment comes sad news — pioneering ABC morning show host named Bill Beutel, has passed away. Actually, I can't say I'd ever heard of him — so in my case, I'm mostly sad that I never got a moment to go: 'Whoa, that guy's name is like my name!' while his mortal coil remained unshuffled. And as these things are said to come in threes, I'm happy to report that veteran cinematographer Bill Butler is still up and around and making mostly crap you've never heard of. That should buy me some time. Friday, March 17, 2006
GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY While I've been too busy most of this week to post anything, I have been noticed that Google's Blogger software has been acting up elsewhere, particularly if you try to visit a particular blogger's profile. But I didn't realize that some people were having problems like this. Betsy Newmark, a B+-lister who was once profiled in the Washington Post has had her website jacked. She's sent e-mails to Instapundit and Michelle Malkin about it, and someone has found it in a cache (ironically, Google's) and re-posted as much as he could find, but that puts the wrong things right.  Frankly, Blogger/Blogspot has had problems off and on for years. Scheduled site maintenance I can put up with, but unexplained outages I cannot. I've tried to excuse the spotty service by considering that Blogger runs the most-used service, and it's free. I've been all but ready to move the Washington Canard to another domain on another platform for several months now, but the No more. If I risk losing my account to a hacker, pirate or some miscreant with a romantic name that he or she probably shouldn't be allowed to apply to him or herself, then I'm gone. Not this weekend... but soon. I don't know if Ms. Newmark's troubles will lead to the kind of attention-getting crisis that Jeff Jarvis' "Dell Hell" campaign did — partly because she isn't nearly as ornery — but I dare say it should. And Google, while I still have good things to say about your web search and e-mail services, but I think that, however inadvertantly, you are being evil. P.S. — It would of course be the height of irony if the Washington Canard disappeared after this post went up. Fingers crossed... UPDATE — Betsy's Page seems to exist again. Apparently they didn't just lose her site and let some moron hijack it and were unreachable and opaque in their public relations... they also hesitated to give her account back. Sounds like the fru-eets of the dev-eel to me. Monday, March 13, 2006
SUNNY DAY REAL ESTATE Less than a week ago it was basically freezing in the District at midday. Today, by contrast, it's 85 and change, and sunny. By the day after tomorrow, it's going to be sub-40 again. So this afternoon I took a short walk around the neighborhood, right along the border of U Street and Columbia Heights, armed with the digi and my Nano (and CYHSY on repeat). My only guiding principle — to take pictures of things that readers of this site have not seen before, or failing that, familiar objects from angles that I haven't shot them from already. Ready?  Notice the flat ridge of hills at the horizon? This underscores both the fact that the city was built on a particularly low stretch of land, and, that few of the buildings throughout the city would have qualified as skyscrapers in 1901.  Believe it or not, people out here drink Arizona Tea.  Look, there's me!  This is an alleyway between two buildings that comprise a single school. I'm guessing the elevated walkway was at one time deemed a prudent safety measure.  I've never quite understood the "Black Family Reunion" mural. Is it that they are an African-American family? Or do they happen to have the surname Black? If it's the latter... it's a good thing their last name isn't White. Do they live nearby?  Rupert Murdoch's global empire claims another street corner.  He's watching. Or listening. Probably to Bloomberg or CNBC — but you can never be sure!  It was not a happy ending for the Latino Auto Sale.    Closing... closing... closed!  Cardozo High. That thing really is a behemoth. It almost looks like a castle or fortress, except if you shot a cannonball at it, I have a feeling that round shot would sail right through the classrooms and out the other side.  This is that undercover police station I've mentioned before. You can tell because it looks ever so slightly more scrubbed and official than the rest of the block. Frankly, the stucco gives away the game. That, and if you come back at three in the morning, all the lights will be on. Maybe I'll do that. But five in the morning is considerably more likely. Saturday, March 11, 2006
FROM THE "X" FILES Here is an e-mail I got technically late yesterday at one of several e-mail accounts that I maintain associated with X (trust me) — and I think I've done the best editing job I can with this: Hi there,I'm pretty sure this someone — who might actually be Googling, or Technorati-ing (that doesn't work at all -- Technorating? -- hmm) — would be very unlikely to find this post. Although by mentioning it so, might someone go find this person (it only takes one dedicated individual) and make them aware of (and possibly angered by) this Dowdification, perhaps even Bowlderization (oh, you noticed?), this cheap yet arresting (I submit) removal of (almost) all context. Too bad this doesn't pay the big bucks. Friday, March 10, 2006
WILLIE! Did you know that George "Max" Wright, who played Willie Tanner, the social worker father on the hit 80's TV show "Alf" was arrested for drunk driving in 2000 -- and in 2003?  How does this make you feel? Thursday, March 09, 2006
JUST HEAR ME OUT Earlier today I did a phone interview with a reporter working on a story about weblogs* for a venerable mid-sized newspaper published in a Midwestern city (hint: the one adorned with a parabola). Afterward, being the curious type that I am, I hit up Google and Technorati looking for examples of his recent work and commentary on said work, if any. What I found instead was... his Blogger profile! A perfectly respectable profile, notable to me only for his listing of multiple Hunter S. Thompson books, thus confirming my long-held conviction that political journalists of this generation continue to idolize the Good Doctor more than they do not. Hey, even I've been known to imitate HST myself on occasion. Via Technorati, I turned up the blog of another recent journalism undergraduate who seemed to enjoy posting photographs of the young ink-slinger himself:  If the picture isn't clear enough, the caption assures viewers that he was "filling the coffee pot... In the bathroom." Thus providing further evidence (as if I needed any) for another of my trivial sociological assumptions, that this generation is setting themselves up for a dozens, if not hundreds, of tiny embarrassments when their children reach Googling age. But I pass no judgment — during my own not-too-distant adventures as a college journalist, I too would fill the coffee maker with whatever technically drinkable water I could find. In my case it was a neglected water fountain in a corner of the student union well known for its frequent visits by the homeless and crazy. I'm just reporting the facts, people. UPDATE — Like it matters, but the guy I borrowed this picture from thinks he's going to refer me to Google for violating his Creative Commons license. At this point, I'm hoping for a subpoena. _____ *At this point I'm starting to prefer "weblogs" in some circumstances, just because two syllables sounds better. To me, anyway. More formal, if nothing else. Tuesday, March 07, 2006
THE SLEEP OF THE DAMNED Most readers here know that I get up before dawn every weekday morning, at least on those days when I'm not late to work. But what you may not know is that every night I have dreams about getting up for work, or worse, not getting up for work. So far this week, I've had variations on this dream two nights in a row. On Sunday night I didn't fall asleep until 12:30, which is way too late for comfort. And in fact, I promptly dreamt that it was time to wake up, and I shut off my alarm... and then I woke up. It was 1:30. Last night I dreamt that I was late for work — like two hours late — and then I woke up. It was a little after 3am. It doesn't seem to matter if I get to sleep by 10pm or what — I still wake up at least a couple times every night, check the clock, and count the number of hours I have left (not to mention the number of times I'll wake up again). Some Saturdays I'll wake up, it's light, I'll look at the alarm clock, and stare at it in fear, trying to remember if this is actually the weekend. Sometimes I'll do this and it's actually Wednesday. Not too often, thankfully. Of course, I've been out of school for nearly four years already, and I still have dreams where it's six weeks into my final term before graduation and I haven't made it to math class, thereby jeopardizing my graduation and immediate future. Or sometimes, because I actually took no math in college, Japanese class. Boy am I ever tired. Sunday, March 05, 2006
PERHAPS NOT SURREAL IN THE BUÑUEL SENSE OF THE WORD, BUT THAT'S NEITHER HERE NOR THERE I've got a few issues with this video, which I might go into at a time when I'm not supposed to be asleep, but that doesn't stop it from being just about the best thing YouTube has brought to my attention since "Brokeback to the Future": UPDATE — Okay, that makes more sense. Saturday, March 04, 2006
ON A WING AND A PRAYER I can't find this logo on the actual campaign website, but I did get it in an e-mailed press release at work earlier this week:  To do something I've never done before and never plan to do again, i.e. quote an old tampon commercial... Wings aren't funny — they're fabulous. I really did plan to switch my registration from Oregon to the District after 2004, but I dunno... now I think I may just keep it. UPDATE — I haven't often moved commentary for the comments up to the post, and most readers will have already seen this, and yes, it was written days ago, but a) it's good and b) as we all know, Haloscan will delete comments after a given period. So here's Danimal, an Atkinson himself, but not related to the Jason Atkinson of the campaign in question: Atkinson has run for Congress a lot. Loses. We stole a campaign sign. He just don't know how to quit, it seems.I can't disagree with that. And even if you do, Haloscan's going to disappear it before long anyway. YOU'VE STILL GOT THAT SHOTGUN SHINE It's been a few years since I've brought up The Sopranos in this space, but then it's been a few years since there have been new episodes to talk about. I probably should have spent some of this time re-watching the first five seasons via Netflix — when Lillo Brancato was arrested recently, I had to think about it for awhile before I realized who he played — but as a fan, it's basically easier to forget the show exists than to agonize over the months, counting down to the next season, which for quite awhile there didn't seem like it was coming back.  Next Sunday it's on again, for at least a few months. Don't expect the Canard itself to become Sopranoland; I'll mostly be satisfying my jones online at TWoP. But then when something really big happens, well, I've been known to dwell on the really big, series-changing whackings, and with the show now heading into the home stretch, it could be almost anybody.That point was driven home in a cover story in last week's New York magazine, which outlined the "Big Pussy rule" i.e. it's official policy that "no one lives forever," elicited David Chase's explanation of how he breaks the news to the actors, and how the cast assembles at a New York restaurant to toast departing colleagues at "whacking parties." Supposedly the author was present at one of these events, or was at least at the same restaurant with some of the cast members. And you could say they were on edge about their potential unemployment: Maybe it’s the wine, maybe the late hour, but suddenly a lot of silver linings are being manufactured. As the waiters bring a round of espresso, [Tony "Paulie Walnuts" Sirico] grabs me by the arm and shoots me the sort of unhinged look — eyes flaring, jaw trembling — that I’ve seen his character give many a marked man before pulling the trigger. “Let me just say this,” he says. “For those of us who survive this year, we have the chance of coming back. That’s profound, you hear that?” His eyes scan his fellow soldiers, one at a time, in a gesture so over-the-top that no one dares interrupt him. “For those of us who don’t survive, there’s no coming back.”True, but somehow I'm guessing Tony isn't going to get all weepy if he has to pull the trigger on Paulie. And I doubt I'd be as shocked as I was last season, but I'd miss him. Related and also worth checking out is the article where six writers imagine how the show will end. One or two are dumb, but they're generally pretty good. Me, I'm going with a combination of the Meadow scenario and one of the Moltisanti theories. So I'll put my pet theory on the record — in the trailer, you've got Christopher talking about his loyalty to Tony as if it's troubling him. It sure might be after last season, but I'm not sold on the idea that he'll blame Tony for Adriana's death — after all, he's the one who turned her in. No, I say look further back. Specifically, to the first episode of season four, where Tony pointed Christopher toward the cop he said was responsible for the death of Christopher's father, Dickie Moltisanti. Later that episode, Chrissy shoots the man to death in his apartment, with Magnum P.I. in the background. Now, I don't believe the elder Moltisanti has ever been portrayed in the series, as Tony's father has — but Tony has talked of him as his mentor. I'm sure there's a fatal flaw in my theory, I'm guessing maybe Tony was responsible for the death of Richard Moltisanti. As we learned back when Jackie Jr. was still above ground, Tony got his start in the family business fairly young — maybe early enough to have this secret* in his past. And maybe Christopher has to kill Tony, and maybe the series ends with Chris running the family. Wouldn't that be appropriately epic? Oedipal even, therefore Greek, classically tragic. And I dunno what happens with Meadow, I'm just saying now that A.J.'s long-expected descent into thug life looks nigh, his death might not be shocking and unthinkable enough to destroy Tony and Carmela. Whack Meadow or put her away for life? Is David Chase that cruel? Yeah, I think he might be.  Anyway, if you've gotten this far, go ahead and click on the image above — that goes to the extended trailer for the coming season, including footage of Ben Kingsley (whom I believe is playing a fictionalized version of himself), Hal Holbrook (who has been old since before I was born), several beatings, shootings and stabbings, and some interiors at the Bada Bing (therefore, NSFW). Like the shorter version this one resembles, it makes effective use of that Nine Inch Nails B-side. And it rewards multiple viewings, yet gives nothing away. Perfect. _____ *One Friday, March 03, 2006
THOSE WHO CANNOT WRITE FOR PITCHFORK... Of course I cannot tell you to download and listen to The Predatory Wasp of the Palisades is Out to Get Us! [MP3], but I will anyway. I'm guessing that if you haven't heard it already, you will set aside what you've already been doing to discover how distractingly beautiful this song is, and if you've already heard it as part of "Illinois" (allegedly not also acceptably-known as "Illinoise") then you may just remember why the late middle of the album is so good. If nothing else, notice what happens at 0:57, at 2:31 and then even at 3:49, and get back to me. (Lyrics are here, by the way.) I've been arguing in conversation for awhile now that Sufjan Stevens is the John Philip Sousa of contemporary American music. If you won't go that far, well, he's surely the first artist in a long while to count as "Americana." And I'm not just saying this because rumor has it his next album may well be "Oregon." If you get through "Predatory Wasp" and are not convinced, try "The Seer's Tower" [MP3]. And for this limited time only, I'll throw in "Decatur, or, Round of Applause for Your Stepmother!" [MP3]. The Stephen A. Douglas/Abraham Lincoln line alone all but makes my point for me. P.S. — Regular Pitchfork-wielders will note that this album came out last year. I could care less, but I won't. |
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